Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Happy Festivus! Let the "Airing of Grievances" begin.

29 comments:

Anonymous said...

I got a lot of problems with you people! There's not enough room on the internets to air all of my grievances.

Unknown said...

My grievance is towards the Washington Redskins and the suggestion that they would even consider firing coach Zorn after the season.

Anonymous said...

Having my second cold in 2 months, right before the holidays. Stupid.

Anonymous said...

To QotD who made me have to reload my grievance because the word verification image didn't show up.

To Norm Coleman ... give it up already.

To that guy who hucked his shoes at Bush ... for thinking of it before I did.

To Bernard Pollard of the Kansas City Chiefs ... for taking out the Savior of the World(TM) Tom Brady in the first quarter of Week 1.

To bicyclists ... who always almost run me over when I, the pedestrian, am in a crosswalk. Seriously?

And last, but not least ... to Lane Bryant and John Candy. I plain just don't like you even though you think I do. So HA! (If you're reading this and know why, you might be a Garbage Plate).

Dan said...

I am mad at capitalism for allocating tens of millions of dollars to Sean Hannity.

John said...

For the abundance of Seinfeld references our generation feels they need to make. It was a good show, but Curb and even Friends (yeah, I said it) are better.

Unknown said...

To off political years, which make it more likely I will need food stamps to afford to grocery shop.

To high heels, because you are so temptingly pretty and yet hurt so damn much.

To humidity, who today wreaked havoc on my hair that is now much to short to pull back.

And to Hillary Clinton's campaign team, who made me cry.

Mike said...

FRIENDS... FRIENDS!?!?!

John said...

Is anyone else thinking of Ed Norton's rant in the 25th Hour?

beenu said...

oh it's on now. i'm airing my grievances with john for liking a crappy show like friends more than seinfeld. i challenge you to the feats of strength!

Unknown said...

i am adding a grievances with beenu and mike, who have denigrated friends and for that must suffer. you're going down beenu.

Cate said...

To CVS employees everywhere... customer service skills, you ain't got none.

To winter... you make me cold and force me to wear pants and make my skin dry and you barely ever make it snow.

To the press... please stop dying, we need you.

To the fool who decided to set up karaoke at Houston's airport during the holidays... thanks for finding the next circle of travel hell. I didn't think it existed.

To the BCS... I hate you and your stupid love affair with Okalhoma. Looking forward to watching them get pounded. Again. Also, why no Bama/Texas game? Cowards.

To the Heisman voters... you will rue the day you denied Colt McCoy.

To the Microsoft Office Suite... get it together, man.

Sarah said...

To coworkers with really annoying laughs...shut up...it's not that funny...you're annoying

To beltway traffic

To 8 days left before christmas with really no shopping done

and i'm totally with the Friends crowd...so much better than seinfeld. seinfeld just whined...

to no naps allowed at the office...screw you

Anonymous said...

People who haven't accomplished anything whining about people who are actually successful and DOING something: STFU.

Global economy, please get it together.

Ditto Cate's comments on CVS employees.

The current (but not for long!) administration: would you please stop acting like it's no big deal that we opened the door for Al Qaeda in Iraq and have been TORTURING people?

The media: hello?! the vice president just admitted he authorized torture! do we really not care about any of this any more?

Scottie said...

To the Rira pub quiz: Seriously...who's going to know what Suharto looks like???

To ESPN: Please please please PLEASE stop treating the Heisman Trophy like it means something. Cate, Colt's better off not having won it, seriously.

To gas and cigarette prices in Bethesda: Are you effing kidding me???

To my new iPod: Why must every other song in shuffle mode be by Nine Inch Nails? I do like NIN, but it doesn't make me wanna work, it makes me wanna break things.

To the calendar: Be Friday already!

To SEC Form 10-K: Why so freaking complicated???

To Stephon Marbury: Well, I just plain don't like you.

To the BCS: So tired of your crap. I personally think you got the title game right, but come on. Step aside, bowl system and let's crown a real champion. (See my plan at www.leftcoastleftbehind.blogspot.com! Shameless plug!!!)

K8 said...

to single people: stop complaining, it's not that bad.

Anonymous said...

To Cate and Beth ... for bashing a well established and successful Rhode Island-based pharmacy and convenience store. BOOOO! I challenge you both to the feats of strength! At the same time.

Go shop at Walgreens you hippies!

Anonymous said...

Oh, and to clarify, my first grievance is directed at certain bloggers, not the general population

Cate said...

someone defending CVS? it's a festivus miracle!

Mike said...

Beenu I think its time we start our own blog for people who appreciate true comedy.

Friends lovers give it up. It was a good show until the writers got lazy and every show was about Ross and Rachel for five seasons. By that point the other characters had gone from being real people to annoying caricatures with catch phrases. They finally mustered up enough enthusaism to write some good episodes in the last season.

Let me add UPS to the grievances list. Its a great policy to deliver your packages at random times of day like 12:45 when everyone in the US is at work. Its a great idea to have huge time blocks on your we missed you notification like 2-5. Its great that you then totally blow off when you told someone the package would be delivered the next day. Finally, its a misnomer to call a location a customer service center when a person takes a bus in a blinding rain storm to arrive at your place of business one minute after closing when you are still handing out packages and then turn said person away. UPS I challenge you to the feats of strength right after we trim the aluminum pole.

John said...

Seinfeld really was known for it's lack of "annoying caricatures with catch phrases." Giddyup!

beenu said...

i'm in mike!

how many times can you guys listen to smelly cat? and don't get me started on bruce willis being on that show. paul rudd was dead to me for a few years after he went on that show.

i have to also air grievances with the metro, especially whoever the hell operates the "switch" at the medical center stop. STOP SCREWING UP AND MAKING ME WAIT 10 MINS FOR A TRAIN THAT'S SO CROWDED THAT I CAN'T GET ON AND HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER 10 MINS TO BOARD ONE THAT HAS ROOM!

John said...

What should be the name of Mike and Beenu's blog? how about

Wearefuckingcomedysnobs.blogspot.com

Unknown said...

i have a grievance with anyone who thinks that Friends is the only show that had less than perfect seasons. I mean, c'mon, the only decent Seinfeld episode in the last several seasons was the Puerto Rican independence day.

So here's a sub QotD: What should Mike and Beenu name their lame Seinfeld cult blog?

Mike said...

wow about this for a blog name:

youregoddamnrightwerecomedysnobs.blogspot.com

I will say this about Seinfeld. I was not a fan of Puddy.

beenu said...

i like the name.

no love for the magic eight ball jacket? high five! let's go to arby's.

John said...

I actually liked Puddy most of the side characters

Unknown said...

of the side characters, i have to go with crazy joe devola.

SngngMSW said...

I didn't get a chance to do this yesterday, so here goes...

- To incompetent co-workers who do not know how to write excel formulas, complete mail merges, or use Bill Gates' other handy tools correctly.

- To Sarah Palin - GO BACK TO ALASKA AND STAY THERE, BITCH.

- To George Bush who has successfully turned the world to shit.

- To my insurance company, to whom I regularly give hours of my life to when I have to spend time arguing with them about the money they owe me.

- To everyone who voted for Prop 8.

- To anti-abortion protesters - I wish YOU had been aborted.